Direktlänk till inlägg 1 oktober 2008
I haven't been writing for a few days now, been busy sticking my head down the toilet I'm afraid.
I hate throwing up, not physically, I'm so used to it so it doesn't bother me, sometimes I kind of wish for that feeling you're supposed to have, you know when your eyes are running and your trying your best to catch a breath and you feel like "if this doesn't stop soon, I'm going to suffocate!". Sounds weird wishing for that doesn't it? But belive me, when throwing up comes as easy as drinking a glass of water, you won't feel as good about it as you might think, especially not when you know the reason for its simplicity..
Mentally on the other hand, throwing up is hell.
Good news is; I've been able to keep what I've been eating for the last two days and it feels like I'm finally back on track again, with some renewed strenght to keep me going a bit longer.
Wish me luck
I defied Ana today, partly. She wanted me to throw up, and I did. Of course.. But not everything. I threw upp half of it and then I stopped. She told me to put my fingers back down my throat and keep them there until She said I could stop, until She ...
You know those meals that are so colourful and fresh and healthy but still sooo good you just wanna have them again and again and again.. I had a dream tonight, in which I found a recipe of one of those meals online. And this recipe was to good to b...
Because the mirror hurts worse than starving...
We've been fighting for a while now, me and Ana. I've been failing alot. Failing makes her angry, which in turn makes me depressed, leading to me failing again. It is time now, for me to take my responsibility. It is time now, for us to m...
"The first feeling was that of terrible constriction. With the sudden act of walking, her infinite dimensions were all at once reduced to a single point. She was compressed back down to the margins of her body, tangled up within its lumpen weight. A ...
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